0I've got 3wks left at home with my lil guy which makes me feel sad and anxious. Now I'm only going back part-time 3 days a week, 10hr days which means I still get to care for him the other 4 days, I still don't want to go but if we want to keep our house, cars, not have creditors calling us, and give our child the life we want to, I have to go back.
I'm sad for the obvious reasons, someone else will be taking care of him and enjoying him. I feel confident in this person I'm simply jealous of them that they get to do this 3x a week and I don't get to do it everyday 24/7.
I feel anxious because I'm worried about the morning routine. I have to be at work at 5:45a which before baby I woke up at 4:15 got showered, ready, ate breakfast and was out the door by 5:25. But now we are adding feed baby and pumping into the routine. I know I could either shower the night before and just simply do damage control to my hair in the AM or wake up at 3:45 and do all it then. On those mornings Marcus has drop off duty so he too will have added duties to his morning routine along with drop off and getting to work on time. Gee no pressure at all, it might help a little if his boss had or wanted children but that's not the case so no sympathy if a rough morning is encountered. Side note I really want to be a fly on the wall the 1st morning Marcus has drop off detail I know he can handle it but I would love to see it all come together.
So not only am I anxious about that but I'm also anxious about sleep time detail. Right now b/c I'm on leave I handle sleep time detail which we only have 1 wake up, usually anywhere between 1-3a. There just seems to be a lot of unknowns and I don't operate well when it comes to the unknowns. Will our lil guy adjust to the changes, will I adjust to the changes, will Marcus adjust to the changes??? We've adjusted well to life as a family of three with some prayer and trusting so we'll continue to take on these changes following the same route. We'll also do some trail runs and I'll practice learning to go with the flow (which I'm awful at). If our trail runs don't go smooth we'll pack up and become traveling gypsies.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm! I just posted on this! If you both work man oh man, do you share? That is so early to wake up. I was working when Gooner was about 3 months old and I had to be up at 4:00 AM and it was NOT fun. Pumping in the bathroom...not fun! Anyway, hopefully mornings work out TRES FABULOUS and that all the transitions are smooth!
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